


All the Reasons

by Antithesiswords (ThatCuteGeek)



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:21:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28748364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatCuteGeek/pseuds/Antithesiswords
Summary: "I really like you Clay" George said, staring into seemingly Dream's soul from beyond the screen..."George, I-" Dream stuttered, "I don't think it could work"A story in which George confesses to Dream about his love, and he must convince the other man to feel the same.Posted on Wattpad under @Antethiswords - "All the Reasons"
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)
Kudos: 3





	All the Reasons

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SeriouslyCalamitous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeriouslyCalamitous/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> George confesses and the story unravels

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first DNF work so I hope you guys enjoy it!!

It was a late summer night near the middle of August when George called Dream. The moon outside of his apartment's window glared into his room, threatening the purpose of the lamp that sat closely nearby. Was he ready? He had asked himself this question many, many times. Of course, it’s not every day you realize you want to be more than friends with a person you've known for years. 

George was very comfortable with his sexuality, never seeing a need to declare nor hide it from any of his friends. Dream, Sapnap, Bad, and nearly everyone else he had streamed or made videos with knew that he was gay, and as far as he knew, no one had a problem with it. This led him to believe that confessing his love for Dream was logical and would yield no negative effects on their friendship. He soon realized, though, that this notion was wrong, as the ringing from discord began as the call went out to his best friend.

He sat there, hands in his lap, fiddling idly with the hem of his shirt until he heard the gentle, yet always affirmative, "Hey, what's up?" from the other side. George exhaled deeply, his nerves starting to have a hold on him, despite his desperate protests.

"Hey, Clay," George started. Somehow, George could sense the other man tense up, as he would never refer to him by his real name unless he was in trouble. The effect is the same as a parent using the full name of the child when they discover their misbehavior: it insights fear.

“I have something I really, really need to tell you.” George attempted to keep his heart from beating out of his chest, but the shaking in his voice and legs made it evident that it would be easier said than done. He swallowed deeply and looked towards the icon of the white little blob that was inhabiting his screen. "I really like you, Clay," George said, staring into Dream's soul from beyond the screen.

The silence that ensued was painful and seemed to last for years, but was, in reality, about ten seconds. "George, I-" Dream stuttered, "I don't think it could work. Between us, I mean!" George's heart dropped. The adrenaline that was coursing through his veins just seconds prior continued, leaving a broken and empty feeling in his chest. His throat constricted and he blinked back tears that threatened to spill. 

Dream sighed, and continued, "It's not you, not at all. I’m just not sure that us being in any sort of relationship, beyond friendship, would be a good idea". Those final words felt like a shot to George’s heart.

"I-I see..." George uttered, barely audibly. His throat tightened so immensely that he was worried he’d soon lose the ability to breathe. Did he even want to breathe? He gripped his mouse tightly, trying to hold onto something that could ground his rising panic. "I'm sorry, Dream,” he said as he moved his mouse shakily towards the end call button. Just click it. Get out of this call so you can rip yourself to shreds as to why you thought that this was going to be a good idea.

Right before George lifted his index finger from the click, he heard Dream speak, "George, please don't beat yourself up over this. I know you. Just...talk to me tomorrow, alright?" 

George gave a small hum of approval, and when Dream realized he was not going to get more than that as an answer, he was the one to hang up the call. George leaned back into his chair, cupping his face in his hands. 

"Goddammit..." he groaned, wishing to be anywhere else than there. How could he be so naive? To believe that Dream could remotely share the feelings that George harbored for him was pathetic. How could George, a British man with no social skills or looks, ever imagine that Dream, a beautiful, tan Floridian man, would love him back? 

Despite knowing that the chances of the outcome he hoped for were nearly impossible, his chest still ached and he still cried. Where had he gone wrong? Perhaps it was meeting Dream in the first place, or maybe it was letting himself get closer to the man. Either way, he had dug himself so deep into a hole, that he had almost forgotten what led him to start digging in the first place.

~

"Oh, George," Dream called out, smoothly as he chased the other man down with a wooden sword. Minecraft Manhunt. Dream had been so confident that the idea would do decently well on YouTube, and when he approached George asking him to help out with the code, and to be hunted, he agreed. He set up the code and loaded it into an online server so they could play together. 

When they both loaded in and their respective recording software was running, the game began. George ran as far as he could to get away from Dream. Even with his attempts, the player’s sprint speed is a constant in the world. Soon enough, as predicted, Dream caught him, killing him shortly before he was able to begin heading to the stronghold. 

"It's not fair! You do speedrunning like, professionally or something. I just play Minecraft casually," George complained, the 'YOU DIED' screen covering his monitor. Dream laughed and George's heart skipped a beat. It had never done that before. He froze, his breath still as he realized the faint, oncoming feeling, and desperately tried to shove it away. 

"Anyways," he cleared his throat and continued. "Make sure to send me your video file later so I can use it to mash up our perspectives. It's gonna be an interesting watch for the viewers." Dream hummed and the sound of the keyboard clicking began to flow through the microphone.

George could hear Dream's breath come through the microphone, as it was too close to his mouth. George normally would ask the person to move their mic and sounds like that irritated him, but this time, he found himself comforted by the noise. To him, it felt closer to when your head rests on your significant other's chest and their heartbeat resounds through your entire body. This feeling flowed through him without thought, and he inhaled shakily. His mind felt clearer, and his work seemed more accomplishable.

The two spoke very little from that point forward, each working on their respective projects. When one would release a grunt of frustration, the other would offer help or comfort, whether it be coding or video editing. They cherished the time they spent together, as words were not necessary to feel close, despite being thousands of miles apart. For them, it was closer than they could have ever hoped of being, and it was enough. 

But George couldn't help but wonder what if it wasn't enough? What if one day they wanted to be able to hug one another, feel the other's presence? Why must they be so far apart? 

They were as close of friends as one could hope for. They talked every day, and every night, constantly called one another. Sometimes they just sat in complete silence, even adjusting their sleep schedules to be the same, despite the major time difference. 

So how could they be content with being just friends over a screen that limited their connection? Why now was he wanting to feel closer to the other man who sat on the other end of the call, oblivious to the thoughts plaguing the Brit's head? Why did he have an urge to put his hand through the screen, to touch the other in any place possible just to feel connected? And it was then, he realized, he had picked up the shovel and started to dig his own grave.

After the first occurance, George often found himself zoning out. Fantasies of him and Dream knowing one another in real life, and of other other-worldly thoughts of how they could've met, dancing through his mind. In another world, they would've grown up neighbors in the same suburb, or he would've been a transfer student into Dream's high school after his family moved to the states from Britain. 

These scenarios, though, were far from how reality decided it must be. They were two men, hundreds of thousands of miles apart on two separate continents with no plan for a future meeting. 

George had never been one to be discouraged by a small road bump, as he saw it. When he told his parents he was going to pursue a career in Minecraft after college, and when he received a lack of support from them, he did not falter in his commitment to his dreams. Now, he was a growing channel, helping his friends alongside himself. So, he would have Dream near him, he decided. Close enough that their breaths may intermingle and combine to create something new...something wonderful.

*~*

Clay, growing up, was the opposite of an extrovert. He was quiet and preferred to be by himself. He was as introverted as a Florida man could be, which by any other state’s standards would’ve made him an ambivert. He always had friends around and never was there a quiet moment in his house. His little sister, deemed 'Drista' by friends that knew his family well, always supported her older brother, always allowed him to be himself around her. She supported his passions and was enthusiastic about his Minecraft career that was up and coming: fast. 

When he was able to finally move out, though, it was not the comfort from his sister nor his parents that helped him adjust to a new life outside of the jurisdiction of watchful, judgmental eyes: it was George. He had met George on a Minecraft server called MunchyMC, and they quickly became friends. 

Chats on the public server quickly became longer calls on teamspeak. They would talk for hours until one of them had to go to sleep so they could be properly rested for the following day. It wasn't until much later that they decided to synchronize their lives by adjusting sleep schedules and work hours to coincide.

One day, though, as Clay was out for lunch with his mother, he asked her a question; one that had been on his mind for quite some time. "Mom," he began, "How do you know when you love someone?"

His mother stopped and put down her fork. She grabbed her napkin and dabbed her mouth, making sure it was clean and her mouth was clear before she spoke, "Well, you just know. She would make you happy and loved. You would want to speak to her every second of every day and want to be near her. When you're apart, you're going to want to be as close as possible to her." 

Once she’d finished explaining, a hopeful look filled her eyes. "Have you finally found someone, Clay? I bet she is wonderful! Your father and I were worried that you were going to be one of those faggots that we see moving around here more often." 

As quickly as the hope of love and acceptance came about in his heart, it was shattered by those choice words: _one of those faggots_. He recused back into himself, his heart beating wildly as he cleared his throat, looking down at his plate.

"Of course not, Mom. Besides, there’s no one in particular. I was just wondering in case I ever do meet that lovely girl, you know?" His voice strained at the word 'girl' that flowed out of his mouth, in a desperate attempt to appease his mother. 

Growing up, he knew that his mother and father were not the most accepting of homosexuals that moved in, but not once had he thought that his parents were worried that he would become something that they detested so much: something he had no control over.

He fidgeted with his fork, his appetite lost after the comment. He became lost in his own thoughts, giving barely satisfactory answers to his mother's questions in attempts of light conversation. The thought of being homosexual and being a disappointment to his family, to his sister, haunted him. 

It was then that any feelings he had harbored for George were suppressed deep into his mind, hopefully to never arise again. To Dream, family was the most important thing. Without them, he would be nowhere as far along in life as he was in that moment.

~

When George gathered Sapnap and himself into a discord call months later due to an 'important announcement', he was nervous. Never once had any of the trio done this before, so for George to call this meeting, it had to be important. And so he waited for George to speak, to explain why they were there.

"So uh..George, what's going on," Sapnap asked as the three of them sat idly in the call.

"I-give me a moment, I'm trying to work up the courage to say what I need to say," he replied, quickly, anxiety seeping from his voice to the other two's ears.

Dream sighed, "George, I'm sure it isn't something too bad." He wanted to help soothe the man, calm down his anxieties...to hold his hand.

"Clay, it is not that simple!" George snapped, lashing out at the man. Dream flinched inwards towards himself, the sudden loud noise hurting his ears due to the well-designed headphones that rested atop his head.

"Hey, George, calm down. I can assure you that no matter what it is, we will be here to support you every step of the way," Sapnap replied after a moment of silence. His voice had gotten more serious, which was a rare occurrence, meaning he was sincere. On the other hand, Dream was nervous. After his outburst, he truly worried about George's health. What if something bad had happened to him, or to someone he knew? Was George going to be okay?

"I-" George started, his breath getting caught in his throat. "I'm gay. I just don't want you to hate me, please. I'm still the same old George!"

Both Dream and Sapnap were quiet. Dream had thoughts and emotions rushing through his head. His mother's words from months before, the thoughts that completely overtook him when he was barely awake at night in his dark room. What overcame his heart, though, was a feeling of disgust, so subtle that the man wouldn’t identify it at the time as one of hatred.

Sapnap, of course, had been the one to speak first, "George, never scare me like that again! That was all? Dude, I thought someone died! Of course we accept you, you're our friend!" He laughed with gratefulness as he spoke, "God, you have me crying all up in the club right now." In response, George let out a soft laugh.

Dream still couldn't comprehend it. A few months ago, he was told that feelings towards men were gross, unnatural, and that anyone who harbored those feelings were disgusting creatures. But, George was not disgusting, he was his best friend. So, he swept all of the negative words into the back of his mind and said, "George, we love you.”

*~*

George woke up the next morning, seemingly to forget the occurrence the night before. He got up, brushed his teeth, and went down the hall of his apartment to the kitchen, where he prepped and made pancakes to satisfy his stomach. As he finished eating, his mind awoke and the memories of the night before seeped in, making his face redden and his heart ache. 

He didn't feel the same, did he? Dream had not entirely shut down his confession, never stating that he didn’t feel the same about the other man, but rather that he wanted to make sure that it would be a good decision. George couldn't decide on whether it was a way to let him down softly as to not crush his spirits, or if it was a chance at redeeming his feelings and that they may be reciprocated by the other. He was worried, he was scared. Scared of how his burst of confidence could have messed up years of long talks, of fun memories and experiences.

As he wallowed in self doubt and hatred, his phone beside him buzzed. He picked it up and read a text from Dream that said, ' _Hey. Down to vc soon?_ ' 

George sighed and quickly replied, ' _Yeah. Give me a moment,'_ before cleaning up his dishes. He walked back into his room, sat on his chair, and pulled up discord. Once he did, he saw that Dream was already sitting in a voice chat alone, waiting on him. He had no time to prepare, to fortify his heart for the rejection that was soon to come.

He joined the call, and quietly said, "Hello? Did I keep you waiting for too long?" He heard Dream fumble with something on his end, before assuring George that he was there and present. "So uh, why did you want to voice chat? And on discord? We normally use team-speak."

Dream sighed, "George, we won’t work. But, you’re still my best friend and I can’t risk losing you, not over something as dumb as love." George's heart broke once again by the realization that it was true: Dream did not love him back, no matter how much he had convinced himself there was a possibility. It was hard to believe, because the man had given many signals to George from the beginning of their friendship. The way he teased him, the way his words melted his entire being into a moldable form that was in Dream's control...there was no way the man truly did not love him back.

"Dream, I don't think you're being truthful to me, or at least, yourself," George said, the other man to be rendered speechless. He continued, "Have you not heard how you speak to me, how you act around me! You never want to be apart from me! Dream, you make me laugh, smile, and want to continue to the next day, and I'm pretty sure that I do the same to you.”

"George, I'm telling the truth! I don’t like you, I _can’t_ like you," Dream shouted, shutting up George and making his stomach drop. He sat there, silent. Neither of the two mans said a word, and George couldn’t even imagine what to say. He was taken aback by the sudden anger that was directed towards him.

Finally, gathering his courage, like he had done before when he first told Dream he loved him, he spoke, "Clay, I know you're lying. Even if you're not, I'm not one to back down easily when someone says no. I know you feel something towards me, and I know it has to be special, or our relationship wouldn't be what it is. I will make you love me, and I will show you all the reasons I love you so you can finally understand."*~*

Dream was, for lack of a better word, nervous. He admired George for his determination, even adored the man for it, but Dream never thought that his stubbornness would turn against him. 

Several had been on the receiving end of George’s iron-will. For example, Sapnap once refused to atone for killing George’s dog on their server, DreamSMP. Ever since then, George had made it his ‘job’ to kill every pet that Sapnap had ever owned. Sapnap, of course, has tried to stop him, but no matter how well he hid the pet or tried to protect it, it always ended up as meat floating on the ground.

So, after hearing George’s words, Dream uttered nothing. Deep down, something in himself knew that George was right in that he _did_ feel something, and that their relationship _was_ special. On the surface, though, he cringed to himself and looked away from his monitor. His mother’s words resounded in his head. Alongside them were George’s, where he said he loved him, that Dream somehow made him _happy_. 

How could Dream incite such emotion in his best friend? How could George say that, somehow pushing by his mother’s words and going directly to his heart, making it pound harder than before—than ever before. His hands began to feel sticky and he had to clasp and unclasp them multiple times to ground himself. _If George can make me feel this way when I don’t love him back, how does he feel about me?_ Dream thought he could find the answer soon enough, but it likely wouldn't be the one he hoped for.

*~*

George had said that what he and Dream had was special. Despite the outburst being in the heat of the moment, and his emotions running on a high, he meant every word he spoke. After the initial conversation, he and Dream quickly fell into a strained silence where neither man dared to say a single word to the other, nor wanted to leave the call and be rude. It was not until Dream said his sister was calling him that the discord call ended. _48 minutes_.

The next week, Dream was going to join George on the SMP and work on gathering resources due to the threat of the uprising headed by Wilbur Soot. As George prepared for his stream, he noticed that only Sapnap had responded to the group DM, asking if everyone was ready. _Dream really isn’t coming. I didn’t fuck it up_ that _badly, right?_

George called the group, leaving the offer open for Dream to join at any time. Sapnap answered quickly, having already affirmed he was ready to start moments prior in the chat. On the other hand, after waiting out the rings, Dream did not pick up. It pained George, but he decided it would not affect how the stream would go, nor his mood going into the stream itself. He started the stream, making sure he looked at least decent for the watchers and that the stream functioned normally.

Quickly, the chat began to fly by, making it hard for George to read even a single message from any person. The words blurred as more and more people crowded in. 

“Hey guys!” Sapnap started up in response to the chat. This had to have been the worst decision the man had made. Sapnap was _not_ a planned co-creator on the stream, and even George understood that many of the watchers were fans of Dream. So when they didn’t hear the sound of their beloved streamer in place of Sapnap, the viewership sharply declined, leaving around 60k people watching. The number was still an impressive pull, but it, of course, was slightly disappointing when it was much higher.

Ignoring the viewership rates and everything else that could put him in a worse mood, George and Sapnap began playing. Their comical banter of George threatening Sapnap’s pets and Sapnap doing the same to everyone else on the SMP was entertaining. They gathered netherite, brewed potions, and gathered resources needed for a baffling amount of TNT.

After hours of playing, George ended the stream and sighed.

“Hey, George, what’s wrong? That was a good stream man! You like averaged—what—58 thousand people?” Sapnap said, trying to cheer him up.

“It’s just,” George started, ”Where was Dream? We made plans like a week ago and he promised to be here!” He exclaimed, his frustration that was building for the entire stream finally released. He sighed, covering his face with his hands, as he often did, and muttered, “God, this is my fault.”

“What?” Sapnap asked, surprised by the assumption. “Dude, why would it be your fault? He’s probably, I don’t know, busy or something. So busy, in fact, that he couldn’t text us to tell us,” he said, his voice trailing off at the end. “Whatever the reason, it’s likely not about you”.

George chuckled and shook his head, comforted by the support and wit of his friend. “No, no, it is my fault. I told him I liked him last week,” he inhaled deeply, letting out a pathetic laugh, “and he said he didn’t feel the same”. 

Tears began to prick at his eyes, and he blinked them away as soon as he felt them. Sapnap was quiet, not saying a word. Sapnap always supported him, no matter what it was, so why was he being quiet? Why was he not saying a thing?

“Hey, I’ll be back later, man. I have a call I need to make,” Sapnap said suddenly, quickly ending the interaction and leaving the vulnerable man alone. 

George couldn’t find the motivation to hold back the tears anymore and they flowed down his face wordlessly. The pain in his throat started to subside and his breathing began to progress rapidly. The dark room gave no comfort or support for the oncoming panic that followed. At that moment, George was all alone.

~

It wasn’t until a couple hours later that George heard anything from either of his two friends. He was at his desk, preparing the VOD of the stream to be uploaded to YouTube when he received a text.

 _Get on Discord. I talked to Dream_ -Sapnap

George grunted, once again slightly regretting his choice in friends. He slowly opened up discord to see Dream and Sapnap already in a call. He checked the chat and it seemed as if they had been on the call for some time, perhaps ever since he had ended the stream.

George joined the call and said nothing, knowing he didn’t have to. The other two men on the call went quiet. Sapnap cleared his throat, but didn’t say anything, seemingly to leave a designated silence for someone.

“Uh, hey George,” Dream said, his voice laced with awkwardness and hesitance. George, on the other hand, felt out of place. It was likely that this is who Sapnap needed to talk to when he left suddenly, and it was likely about him due to the current predicament. 

“Hello, Dream,” George replied, his hands in his lap and his breathing shallow. He thought about how Dream canceled on him without actually _telling_ him. How Dream seemed to be avoiding him no matter what. How Dream was running from something.

George cut through the silence quickly, with the simple, yet loaded question of, “Where were you?” 

His heart hurt, the pain constricting and taking hold of his mind, which would be dangerous when proceeding to get a truthful answer out of Dream. But, he sat there, patiently, as he awaited a response. Would Dream lie? Would he tell the truth? But what would be worse, a lie coated in a dream or a truth laced with ketamine?

“I was busy,” was all that Dream said. The hasty answer along with the sharp tone drove spikes into George. He sat, confused and lost.

“You were busy? That was it? Then why didn’t you text me or Sapnap? People were expecting you, Dream, do you have no dignity?” he asked, venom cutting through his words. He promised himself he would not let his emotions get the best of him, but it seemed it was all in vain.

“Something came up, and I don’t need to explain to you what it was, George. You aren’t my mother so stop doting on me like that. Besides, it isn’t a big deal,” Dream replied, toxicity trailing his spats at George. Honestly, George hadn’t expected for Dream to match the energy he put out, as he usually was the calmer one, but perhaps he truly did not know the other man.

“Guys, please,” Sapnap had started, attempting to intervene before either side said something they would regret, but it was too late.

“Not a big deal?” George asked, his hands clamping into a fist. “Dream, it is a big deal! I know it's just a stream and I know things like this do happen, but I know you better than that. The fact that you brushed it off so quickly, so dismissively, means you meant to miss it on purpose!” George had to lower his volume when he realized he was yelling, but he did not have the self control to stop.

“After what we went through just a few weeks ago, you pull this stunt? Our first collaborative thing since then? It was intentional, and you clearly don’t even respect me as much as I respect you! God, Dream, I would drop anything I had to do if it meant being there for you, but clearly you’re too selfish to do the same for anyone else,” he hissed, words barely processed before they went out. He stopped himself from continuing, believing he made his point. 

The past weeks, Dream had been ignoring him, but acted normal when others were in a chat. Whenever he needed to talk to Dream, George attempted to have someone else in the chat as well, typically Sapnap, leading to them having more conversations than before. Dream’s responses to George were short and curt. George had assumed he'd had a bad day or he was in a bad mood. It didn’t take him long to realize it was deliberate.

“George, I’m sorry,” Sapnap said, which brought George back from the thoughtful plain he’d lost himself in. When he looked back at his computer, Dream had not only left the call, but had left the group chat itself. 

“Sap, what happened? What did you say to him,” George asked, his voice small and faint. 

“I just told him you were hurt that he didn’t show up. He brushed me off, like he did to you just now and I got upset at him too. Eventually, we just...decided to add you. I thought maybe he would’ve explained something to you, but he just...left,” Sapnap sighed, obviously distraught. “I tried, man, but this is too much, even for me.” 

Sapnap’s voice was strained, seemingly worn out and exhausted. George felt guilt rise in him as he shamefully looked down at his lap. He’d caused so much pain to his friends recently through his venture and it hurt _him_ to know that it was completely his fault. His confession to his friend had driven a stake between not only them, but between Sapnap and Dream.

“Hey, Nick, you don’t need to try anymore, okay?” George said softly, his voice shaking. “Whatever it is with Dream, I can deal with it. I’ll get him back to normal, okay?” 

“I just want to make sure my two best friends are getting along,” he said, feigning enthusiasm, making George believe that his friend was doing better already.

“Yeah, thanks man. I really appreciate it,” George replied.

That night, Dream received a text while he slept.

_'Reason 1: You make me feel'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Any and all feedback is welcome!


End file.
